Bang, Bang

I recently watched The Departed and was reminded of one of the few recent funny moments of SNL.


Iran Watch:
Iran's secret plan for summer offensive to force US out of Iraq - Iran is secretly forging ties with al-Qaida elements and Sunni Arab militias in Iraq in preparation for a summer showdown with coalition forces intended to tip a wavering US Congress into voting for full military withdrawal, US officials say. The official said US commanders were bracing for a nationwide, Iranian-orchestrated summer offensive, linking al-Qaida and Sunni insurgents to Tehran's Shia militia allies, that Iran hoped would trigger a political mutiny in Washington and a US retreat. "We expect that al-Qaida and Iran will both attempt to increase the propaganda and increase the violence prior to Petraeus's report in September [when the US commander General David Petraeus will report to Congress on President George Bush's controversial, six-month security "surge" of 30,000 troop reinforcements]," the official said.

UN steps up inspections of Iran's nuclear sites - President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad said April 9 Iran had mastered industrial-scale production of nuclear fuel giving up a research-level program. Recent reports said Tehran was already running 1,600 uranium enrichment centrifuges in the Natanz underground complex.

Iran, Belarus Cement Ties - The Iranian and Belarusian presidents on Monday vowed to cement ties in a bid to start what the Belarusian leader called as "a strategic partnership".

Columbia High teacher accused of sex act with student - A social studies teacher at Columbia High School was charged Monday with repeatedly having oral sex in his classroom with a 16-year-old male student during the school day.

Religious leaders urge action on warming - Christian, Jewish and Muslim leaders are urging President George W. Bush and Congress to take action against global warming, declaring that the changing climate is a "moral and spiritual issue." "Global warming is real, it is human-induced and we have the responsibility to act," says the letter, which will run in Roll Call and the Politico, two Capitol Hill newspapers. "We are mobilizing a religious force that will persuade our legislators to take immediate action to curb greenhouse gases," it says.

Maybe:
The classroom 'cancer risk' of wi-fi internet - Britain's top health watchdog has called for an inquiry into the use of wireless Internet networks in schools because of concerns they could be exposing children to the risk of cancer. The demand came after it was revealed that classroom "wi-fi" networks give off three times as much radiation as a typical mobile phone mast.
Maybe Not:
Scientists reject Panorama's claims on Wi-Fi radiation risks - An investigation into the possible dangers of Wi-Fi technology - wireless computer networks - by the BBC documentary programme Panorama has been rejected as "grossly unscientific" and a "scare story" by leading scientists. The programme will claim that the radiation given off by a Wi-Fi laptop is "three times higher than the ... signal strength of a typical phone mast". But the experiment carried out by the programme did not take into account a "basic" scientific concept and presented a bogus comparison, critics say.

Hundreds flock to Nepal shrine for "sweating" idol - Hundreds of people have flocked to a remote village in eastern Nepal to see a "sweating" idol of a Hindu god, a sign of impending turmoil or natural disaster for the devoutly religious nation.

Okay fellas, if you manage to convince your lady friend to let you install a stripper pole, make sure you do it right.